The Wild Life

We live in a stereotypical suburban development.

Earlier this winter, my brother heard loud noises in the ceiling crawl space. After some fumbling around with ladders and flashlights we determined that a raccoon had taken possession of the attic. My brother chased it out and found a loose board under an eave above a projection that allowed the beastie to climb up and in. He reattached it and the attic has remained vacant.

In January, something ate through the connecting hose between the dishwasher and the sink drain. My brother replaced the hose and set a mousetrap under the sink. When that was tripped to no effect, he went out and bought a much larger rat trap but the rat was way too smart for that. It did make the mistake of coming out while I was up, though. It was huge, fat, sleek and beautiful. I chased it along the edge of the living room and behind the bookcase. When it came out the other side I was afraid it was going for my brother's room but it took a left into the laundry room instead. I blocked off the space under the laundry room door and chased it into the garage (which door has a step and therefor no clearance allowing re-entry). It hasn't returned that I know of but it was fastidiously clean and (unlike a mouse) left no indication of it's presence anywhere visible.

A few nights ago, as I was sitting in the living room, I noticed a little face pushed up against the glass door to the lanai (the wall between the living room and lanai consists of three floor-to-ceiling glass panels one of which slides open). It was an opossum. I went to the door and waved at it to no effect. So I took the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog (which has multiple offerings of expensive high tech toys and cleaning robots and shoes and slippers for sufferers of plantars fascitis (hey, it's their demographic) but not one thing (I checked) for removing 'possums from your back porch) and slapped the glass with it. It moved to look around the catalog. So I turned on the lanai light. It blinked, assumed it was now daylight, and slowly walked back to the hot tub where there is apparently a hole in the screen big enough for a 'possum to get through.

Yesterday, as my brother was carrying groceries in from his truck, he had to stop at the front door to say hello to a rabbit that was hanging out with one of the gnomes. Last night the opossum was back in the lanai peering into the living room again.

We live in a stereotypical suburban development. Really.